How We Met:
My husband and I had a long distance relationship. I met him while visiting Colorado Springs at a conference with my church. (Jon's mom was coordinating the event and set us up!) We talked for three hours that night and realized very early on that we were going to get married. Long distance pushed us to talk about the "hard subjects" fast. All we got to do was talk. Jonathan quickly became my very best friend, and after 5 months of dating my husband purposed to me.
Engagement:
My husband purposed to me on the roof of my home church overlooking the city of Pittsburgh. Being engaged was a dream come true. I was the girl who had my wedding planned out by age 12. Yet, this was also the most challenging period of my life. I understood marrying someone whom I had not yet know for a year was completely out of the norm. Everyone, however, who was close to us knew that we were brought together by God. We found the biggest difficulties in the opinions of outsiders. People who cared about me genuinely wanted to make sure I was making a smart decision. Unfortunately, it wasn't always expressed in a loving manner, and it has, to this day, tainted relationships and feelings that I have with certain individuals.
Not only was I being looked at under a microscope by everyone around me, but this was the first time, EVER, that I was leaving home- moving across the country (I grew up in Pittsburgh), leaving my parents, friends, church, and family. It was the most emotional season of my life.
The Stigma:
Everyone thought the only reason I got married so quickly was because I was pregnant... Which was NOT true. Others also told me that I was not walking with God if I made such a crazy decision like this. I had close family members and lifelong friends not attend my wedding because they "didn't agree with it".
Wedding planning:
My parents weren't 100% on board, at first, with us getting married so quickly after the engagement. Which is completely understandable, but we really felt like God wanted us to get married, start our lives together, and serve Him together "now". Once they prayed and contemplated, they got on board with the timeline. They gave me the wedding of my dreams. It was a party I did not deserve and a celebration I always dreamed of. Yet, even while looking at venues, the wedding planners definitely had their opinions about my life too! They were totally either extreme. Sometimes they would tell me stories about couples they knew, or they themselves, had got married young and how great those relationships are. Others were "stand-offish" and abruptly stopped asking me questions about my engagement once they understood my story.
Traditions:
Because of the quickness of our wedding planning and the timing of our lives I didn't get to do a lot of the traditional bridal activities. My sweet mother in law threw me a surprise bridal shower out here in CO, but I didn't have the chance to do one with my family. Nor did I get to do any sort of bachelorette event with my bridesmaids because we were all so scattered across the country. The day before our wedding we squeezed in a family breakfast, rehearsal lunch, bridesmaid nail apt., and a guest ice cream social. Why did we make this all one day? Because EVERYONE was from out of town. It was such a long, exhausting, but memorable day. Definitely not traditional, though, by any sense of the word.
I don't want this to sound ungrateful. Because I am so grateful! In the end.. I had my dream wedding, dream man, dream new family-in-law, and amazing memories. Getting married at 19 years old was a crazy roller-coaster. I grew up quick, and I had to really lean into that still, quiet voice of God to figure out what HE wanted Jon and me to do and to find hope in those difficult situations. Being married at age 19 was a culture shock. I was now thrown into the "adult world". But it wasn't just about me, by myself, anymore. It was about God, Jonathan, and I.
Here are the benefits, to getting married young,
that we experienced:
Long distance was over
Growing up together is fun
I get to hang out with my husband longer than most before starting a familyÂ
Making similar mistakes together
Figuring out what our finances look like together
Experienced a deeper relationship with God through intimacy with eachother
Understanding our calling into ministry together
Sharing so many of life's "firsts"
These are just off the top of my head. I was never someone who wanted to get married young. I am independent and like to figure things out on my own. But in the grand scheme of things, God is the one who knows us better than ourselves. He knew where I needed to be and who it was going to be with. He exceeds my expectations. In the good and the bad, He has been my rock. Instead of looking to the world around me to see what marriage looks like, I've gotten to turn to God and see all of the beauty He holds for Jon and I.
Believe it or not this was the SHORT version. So if you have any question DM me or send me an email. Contact info is on my blog. Happy Saturday. I cherish you guys so deeply and am grateful for the opportunity to be apart of your lives. I hope you have a good week leaning into the promises of God.
-Sophia Marie Â